Time and Relative Dimension in Space

I picked up the coinbox in the picture and showed it to my eldest. I asked, "Faris, what is this?"

Proudly, he yelled out, "It's the TARDIS".

This is what I call "fandom parenting".

:)

Handling Two

I am surprised that I am handling being a mother of two much better than how I handled being a new mom.
I suppose the key word then was "new".

But handling two, a 3 month old and a 3 year old, has been... interesting, for the lack of a better word.

I try to spend as much time with Faris, him being the elder child who needs more of my attention in that sense.
So when I can, I still build block towers with him, draw, spell words with his magnetic alphabets, watch Team Umizoomi or just throw a ball back and forth.

Faruq has developed a liking to be rocked to sleep in the arms before I can put him down in his cot,
which means I have limited time to do everything-
time that I miraculously am able to divide between spending time with Faris and house chores.

My mornings are fast-paced that, by 10:30am, I feel winded.
When the boys wake up, I make breakfast for Faris,
Bathe Faruq,
nurse him,
Then bathe Faris,
watch some cartoons with him,
nurse Faruq again and put him down for a nap.
I get about 15 minutes to myself before I have to start on lunch before Faruq wakes up.
Move on to laundry,
Feed Faris lunch.
All of Faruq's diaper changes in between.
Nurse Faruq again.
And put both both boys down for a nap by 3pm.

3 to 5pm is my quiet window.
Most of the time, I forget whether I've: 1. eaten, 2. showered, or 3. solat.

I don't nap in the day. My body just won't let me sleep. I have no idea why.

When Husband comes home from work, he tries to relieve me of as much chores as possible.
Only Allah s.w.t. can ever repay him for his kindness and sacrifices.

By the time everyone is asleep at night, this is the dance I do:

[x]

Another great day comes to a close, Alhamdulillah.
Another grand day ahead tomorrow, insyaAllah.

Mother of 2

Alhamdulillah, I'm done with confinement.
Although I didn't get to be all manja this time around because I have a 3 year old to look after.
I followed strict confinement diet, wore socks, no heavy lifting.
That's about it.
Other than that-
cooking, vacuuming, laundry, bathe the boys...
Did them all.

There are days when everything seem so overwhelming.
I have a pair of arms that can only hold one baby at a time.
When both want simultaneous attention, that's when things get slightly overwhelming.

Faruq is wonderful.
He's independent in the sense that if I leave him to play in cot while I need to run chores, he'll just play on his own or just stare at the moving mobile..
And he sleeps rather well on his own, too.

Faris can throw abit of a tantrum.
He wants attention.
But more often than not, he's very understanding that Bonda needs to be with adik more.
So proud of him.

It has it's challenges.
There are days I just want to cry in the bathroom.
But it's always been good. Never bad.

Alhamdulillah.
So blessed to have these two boys.

Our Second

You know when there's a pool of something sweet on the kitchen counter, and it is unfortunate enough that there's a ring of ants surrounding it?
And then you disturb their nectar snack time and they scurry?
Ever notice how they scurry?
In every which direction. An organized panic, if you will.

That's what happened at 3pm-ish, Saturday, 21st July 2012, when the doctor ruptured my water bag and found that it's not the clear fluid that it's supposed to be, but green - like pea soup.

Doctor yelling instructions to nurses.
Nurses half running to get equipments, medication, etc.
And me -
I just laid there, instinctively one hand on my belly, trying to protect my baby from this chaos,
when the threat to him was already inside.

"Ceasar. Now!" was all I remembered the doctor half-yelling.
After that was just... buzzing.
Part of this tuning out was panic.

I was in labour.
Contractions were good.
Starting to dilate, albeit at a very slow rate.
But once the water bag broke, doctor informed me that baby had passed motion in the belly.
He didn't know how long it's been like that, but it was crucial for him to get the baby out, immediately.

Alhamdulillah, after my second emergency ceaser, our second son was born.

Faruq.
One with the ability to distinguish right from wrong.
3.06kgs

Due to the fact that whilst in the belly he already inhaled the contaminated amniotic fluids,
Faruq has been in an incubator since birth.
I haven't held him.
I haven't fed him.
Or kissed him.

This breaks my heart, but I have faith that this is Allah's plan.
This is the best for him, and the best for us.

Redha.
And with patience, insyaAllah, we'll have our boy soon.

Reading with the Leapfrog Tag

 
Faris' recent birthday, his wonderful Aunty Julia bought him the Leapfrog Tag reading system.
I've seen it in stores but never really had the idea of what it actually is.
I'll tell you what it is; It's all kinds of awesome.

The Tag reading system is a smart pen-like device that helps your child read.
Once you've synced it with your computer, you can store up to 5 books in the Tag reader.

You point the pen/ Tag reader onto the page/sentence/word and it'll read it aloud for you.

Now, the Tag books.
With the Tag reader, there are so many things you can do:
1) the Tag reader reads the story for you/your child
2) you can read along with the Tag reader
3) there are interactive games/quizzes on each page, if not, most pages.
4) the Tag reader says/spells/phonically sounds out words - teaching your child to read and spell
5) or you can just read the book aloud with your child, without the Tag reader.

It's just really wonderful. And with repetition, Son can already read-along a little bit of  "Click Clack MOO!".

Looking forward to expanding the Tag books library in this house. I'll be cataloguing all of the Tag books at Faris' digital library blog: Knight's Books

If you have a younger child, and would like to introduce reading at an early age, you should try the Leapfrog Tag Junior reading system.

Colour Wonder

Son loves his art time.
Doodles and squiggles.
He outgrew crayons.
He prefers markers.

However, the problem with markers, although they're washable, he draws on any surface he can find, including on his own skin i.e. face.
Not on purpose though.
He walks about with the marker's top opened and just, shall I say, transfers the colours onto surfaces not his paper/easel.
Well, sometimes, it's on purpose. :p

So we found this wonderful alternative by Crayola.

Mess Free.
Color Wonder.

The ink is invisible, non-toxic.
And it only appears on the special paper.
It's amazing.

Parents with toddlers looking to encourage art time should definitely consider this.
We bought it at our one-stop Crayola store, Tango Mango at The Curve.
It's about RM30+ for a set of the booklet of special paper and 5 markers.

Anis

Parenting Motto

Our parenting motto is simple:

There can neither be too many books,


nor toys.


But still, it's not about the quantity.
It's about the time and lessons you, as parents, impart on your child(ren).
Toys and books are just aids.

Paces

Several family members and some other irrelevant parties have been asking, or rather, making comments about:

a) Your son is old enough. Why haven't you applied for Masters?

First of all, our son is barely 2 years old. How can he be "old enough"? This is the impressionable stage where he needs his parents the most. Why would I leave him home now?
I have no interest in continuing my studies anytime soon. I believe that there is such a thing as too much, too soon.

b) Why aren't you working? You graduated on the Rector's List and you're wasting your degree by staying home.

For your information, we are quite comfortable with what we have. It's not much. It's sufficient. We've never known hunger. Bills, rent all paid on time. My husband has never pressured me to work. In fact, he's actually very happy with my decision to be a housewife/stay-at-home-mom.

I believe I am not wasting my degree. I am applying it to my son. AlhamduLillah, he's barely 2 and he knows his alphabets, numerals up to 10 and parts of the Arabic alphabets.
He uses sign language.
He knows most farm animals and the sounds they make.
He dances. He sings.
And just the other day, he spelled G-U-I-T-A-R and sound out "TAA".
He's happy and healthy.
How is that "wasting" my degree?

c) Other women are wives/mothers AND they are working whilst doing Masters. If they can do it, why can't you?

If they can do it, good for them. I know my capabilities and my limits.
But to say "if they can do it, why can't you?" is incorrect to me.
Everyone works at their own pace.
They have certain abilities you might not have. And they may not have what you have.
Example: Not everyone is cut out to be a doctor, so that argument is irrelevant.

x

It's really about knowing when a load is just enough to carry, and when you're biting off more than you can chew.
It's about going at your own pace.
So this is what I'm comfortable with. What I am capable of.

They say "think about your son's future".
I am. That's why I am home with him, nurturing him, educating him, loving him.
This is my decision.

Maybe in the future, if Allah s.w.t. wills it, I will continue with my Masters when the kids (insyaAllah) are in school, insyaAllah.

This is my pace.
Anis

Fun Food

As a parent, once your child starts eating solids, there's always that nagging feeling of where to get the best nutritious food for him/her.
There are alot of off the rack bottled food and instant cereals out there.
But is it good?

As a stay-at-home-mom, I have the priviledge of making my son homemade food for every meal.
www.wholesomebabyfood.com has been my best friend, on top of other menus I've created for my son.

Then there's the task of making food interesting.
Making meal times fun.
My son loves colourful and shaped snacks.
And for this, creativity is needed. I have Playhouse Disney Channel's Tasty Time with Ze Fronk to thank.

Arrange your child's veggies in traffic light colours; cheery tomato for red, yellow peppers/potato for yellow and cucumber/green peppers for green.

Get a cookie cutter and cut your child's sandwich in fun shapes; a tuna sandwich cut in a shape of a fish, or a cucumber sandwich in a star shape.

Accompany the meal with a story about the food.

Try different recipes for new taste and gastromic experience.
My son loves rice in different chicken -vegetable soups.

And I think it's best to treat your child to a great dessert once in a while.
Make fairy bread.
Bake cookies and cupcakes.

My niece is a picky eater but once we've tried to make food and eating fun for her, she eats alot.

Eating can be fun for your child.
And the preparation can be fun for you.

A mother of a healthy and avid eater (AlhamduLillah),
Anis.

Heinous

Earlier today, we went to the playground at my brother's house.
Took our son and our niece.

As usual, at the park, there are countless of mothers and maids with their children/charges.
So this one father pushing his daughter on the swing sticks out like a sore thumb.
I thought, "How nice of this father to take time off after work (because he was dressed in a striped shirt and slacks) and take his daughter to the playgroud? Not something you see very often. Good for him.

There's this two overweight girls playing at the playground too. Nice girls. Very polite. Always made sure that niece or son was clear from the slide before they came down it (unlike other kids who just power through, almost always semi-knocking niece/son down). Other kids stared. Must be hard to walk in those girls shoes. I felt for them.

Then, there was an opening at the swings, next to the father who was pushing his daughter. Took my son there and sat him next to the girl and her dad. Then, something heinous happened.

The father, attempting to make small talk or break the ice with me, made fun of the two overweight girls, claiming that they would be a nuisance to pry out should they get stuck in the covered slide.

I was so shocked. That was a horrible thing to say. Much less to a stranger, in the presence of your own child. What is he teaching his daughter? That it's ok to make fun of other children? I was so revolted but I also felt defensive. I said that they aren't that big for the slide and that there was more room down the slide than he thought. And that they are good girls.

He didn't try another attempt at small talk. I moved my son from the swings like that man was something so horribly diseased and contagious. Whatever awe or respect I had for that man or would've had, is now gone.

So gone.

This is the life

Raising a toddler is a busy task.
I count my blessings each day that I am very priviledged to be a stay-at-home mother.
Our son is learning so much and conveying all that he has learnt, experimenting this and that.

We had a little housewarming a while back, and are very fortunate to know so many wonderful people.
Every thing Husband and I cooked were wiped clean off the plates and pots, Alhamdulillah.
It was a success.
And seeing old friends and their new lives (post-school/university) is refreshing.
Especially ones with children.
Now our children play together.

Alhamdulillah. Life is grand.

The Wonders of Being a Child

" Fairy tales do not tell children that dragons exist. Children already know dragons exist.
Fairy tales tell children that dragons can be killed."
- Author, G.K. Chesterton

Image source

Signing Spectacular

A friend introduced us to the idea of Baby Signing.
It's an awesome thing to do with your child.
It develops this wonderful bond and works as an educational platform for your child.

We bought a baby sign book from a local bookstore and taught ourselves the basic signs.
When in doubt at the sign description, websites like this and this helped alot.

We started teaching baby sign to our son slightly later than most.
At 13 months.
We started slow as to not overwhelm our son with information.
We thought him the basics.
"Mom", "Dad", "Hungry", "Play", "Milk".
Then we started introducing Animal signs accompanied by flash cards, pictures of the animal.
"Cat", "Bird", "Bear", "Monkey", "Lion".

Alhamdulillah, with consistency and patience, a month and a half after introducing baby sign to our son, he can now tell us he wants "Milk" or that he's "Hungry".

And most recently, he saw a picture of a Bear and signed "Bear".

Happy days!

Parents can take courses/classes for Baby Signs.
You can also learn from books and signing sites, like myself.

It's simply spectacular that before your child can speak, you can already communicate with him or her.
Or even carry a simple conversation.

You'll be amazed at the rate his/her brain absorbs his/her surroundings and what they have to tell you after certain experiences.

Proud Parents of Knight

Nekad

Nekad.
Kami nekad, insyaAllah, to save for our 10th wedding anniversary.
Kami nekad ingin sambut di sini:


InsyaAllah Faris will be 9,
And adik-adik nya pun (insyaAllah) by that time dah usia sekolah rendah.
Boleh bawak bercuti, sekeluarga.

Nekad.
Anak teruna kami ni nekad.
Nak buat satu benda, akan dia cuma sampai boleh.
Hari ini, di rumah Bayu,
dia nekad panjat tangga sendiri.
Alhamdulillah berbuah usaha.
Sampai ke atas panjat anak tangga, tak berpimpim.
Tapi, Bonda and Ayahanda sentiasa stand by tepi dan belakang dia.

Syabas, wahai Satria kami.

Breastfeeding

When we were pregnant with Faris, I was always very adamant about breastfeeding him.
Little did I know it would be one of life's greatest challenges.

After Faris was born, my milk supply came in a day later and it was painful.
I had no way to pump out the milk and I couldn't feed Faris as regularly because he was in isolation.
These two reasons caused engorged breast and a whole lot of pain.
Engorged breasts can cause fever or demam susu, which may hinder feeding your child.
I took the mildest of painkillers and prayed, and tried very hard to breastfeed my baby.

When feeding, a new pain is introduced.
Suckling can cause nipple chaffing and/or cuts.
And since you still need to feed your child in these circumstances, it hurts like a mother.
Again, praying helps.
And nipple shields. They're God sent.

And then there's the worry of "Is my baby getting enough milk?"
Or "Will my milk supply be enough to sustain my child?".
Step One: Don't worry too much. The more you worry/stress out, the less milk you'll produce. It's psychological.
Step Two: Observe. If your child seems content after feeding and falls asleep, most of the time this is a sign that he/she is getting enough.
Step Three: Up your dairy intake. Eat healthy food and loads of greens. Buah kurma (dates) helps a whole bunch, insyaAllah. These will help with your milk supply.
Step Four: Pray. To Allah s.w.t for aid.

The odd hours that and the constant sitting up due to breastfeeding can be a chore.
But persevere.
This is the best that you can do for/give your child, insyaAllah.
Although, you should remember to get ample rest, because you should always take care of yourself to be healthy and happy. Only then you can take care of another.

The pain.
The worry.
The odd hours.
It's enough to make anyone opt for formula feed.
If you have the means, and you're willing to make certain sacrifices, despite the fact that you're working/studying/low millk supply, breastfeeding is one of the most satisfying and rewarding (on so many levels) thing you could do for your child.

As a Muslim, breastfeeding is one of the many priviledges Allah s.w.t. has bestowed upon us.
The nutrients contained in the milk is more than any formula man can ever create.
Not to mention you save a whole lot of moolah. :D

So this is my response to the constant questions I have been getting about breastfeeding.
Some for educational purposes.
Some to ridicule me.
Some to spark discussions/arguments.

Alhamdulillah, I have been blessed with the ability to fully breastfeed my son these past 14months.
I pray for another 10months worth of milk supply.
And I pray other mothers will be as priviledged or more as I have been in breastfeeding.

Weight Loss

I was chubby as a kid.

The week before I gave birth,
my weight peaked at 90kgs (happily so, I had a big baby).

3 months after giving birth, I lost all my baby weight,
mostly due to breastfeeding and the odd hours.

Now, my son is crawling really fast,
walking without us having to hold him up,
and learning to run.

I expect more weight loss to come.
:D

Scary

A few nights ago, I was with the family going up the walkelator at a supermarket.
Then I saw something that gave me cold sweats,
stomach tied in a knot,
blood-drain from face.
Just -the horror.

A father placed his newborn baby, who was in the carseat carrier, on the shopping trolley.
Not IN. On.
No straps -going DOWN the walkelator, at a possible 45 degrees angle.
There wasn't anything that was keeping the carrier from slipping.
AND
The father hand his hands busy with the Iphone.

It was scary.

Just as scary are parents who attach their babies' car seat on the passenger side of a car that has airbags.
SILA BACA SAFETY MANUAL.
You're not suppose to attach the carseat in front if your car has a passenger side airbag. Even if you don't have a passenger side airbag, attach it at the back.

And then there are those who sit in front with their babies. Passenger side. No seat belt.

*sigh*

Call me paranoid, or overprotective.
But I call it safety measures.

Tak kena, takpa la.
Dah kena nanti (na'uzubillah), nangis air mata darah - menyesal tahap mana pun cannot turn back time.

Please parents.
For the safety of your beloved children, be smarter.

Closed

Yes.
It has come to that point.
Our son has reached the stage of being the explorer that would shame Dora herself.
Hence, the gate.

Seriously, when did our Son grow up?

Ayahanda/Bonda

Learning Process

It was challenging when Faris was born a year ago.
We didn't know what to do.
How to change a diaper?
How to bathe a newborn?
How to put his playsuit over his head without handling him so much?
What to do when he cries nonstop?

Those things.

Things got better with time.
We adapted.
We learnt.

But the learning process never ends.

Once who've learnt something, something new, something different comes alongs.
Patience is always tested.
Not a proud moment when you lose it, and become one of those parents you vowed never to be.

But at the end of the day, you cut yourself some slack.
Because you're still learning.

As your child grows, you're growing with them.

So when tested, and you do lose it, and then feel so horrible about it;
cut yourself some slack.
Let it go.
And learn.

That is the make of a great parent.

It's evident you're a parent when...

... you scout for baby-friendly places to go to i.e. malls with baby rooms/restaurants with baby chairs or enough space for a baby chair.

...you head straight towards the Baby & Toddlers section of the book store.

... the only blogshops you know of are for baby clothes.

... you buy more baby clothes than any of your clothes combined, for the past 20 years or so.

... you develop a skill to inhale your food.

... you can multitask even when you have your baby in one arm (which includes the use of the feet).

... you daydream about which pre-school/school you want to send your child to one day.

... you go crazy happy when they hack the price of diapers, even by RM1.

Yeap. That's us.
Life's grand.

Knight's Parents.