Several family members and some other irrelevant parties have been asking, or rather, making comments about:
a) Your son is old enough. Why haven't you applied for Masters?
First of all, our son is barely 2 years old. How can he be "old enough"? This is the impressionable stage where he needs his parents the most. Why would I leave him home now?
I have no interest in continuing my studies anytime soon. I believe that there is such a thing as too much, too soon.
b) Why aren't you working? You graduated on the Rector's List and you're wasting your degree by staying home.
For your information, we are quite comfortable with what we have. It's not much. It's sufficient. We've never known hunger. Bills, rent all paid on time. My husband has never pressured me to work. In fact, he's actually very happy with my decision to be a housewife/stay-at-home-mom.
I believe I am not wasting my degree. I am applying it to my son. AlhamduLillah, he's barely 2 and he knows his alphabets, numerals up to 10 and parts of the Arabic alphabets.
He uses sign language.
He knows most farm animals and the sounds they make.
He dances. He sings.
And just the other day, he spelled G-U-I-T-A-R and sound out "TAA".
He's happy and healthy.
How is that "wasting" my degree?
c) Other women are wives/mothers AND they are working whilst doing Masters. If they can do it, why can't you?
If they can do it, good for them. I know my capabilities and my limits.
But to say "if they can do it, why can't you?" is incorrect to me.
Everyone works at their own pace.
They have certain abilities you might not have. And they may not have what you have.
Example: Not everyone is cut out to be a doctor, so that argument is irrelevant.
x
It's really about knowing when a load is just enough to carry, and when you're biting off more than you can chew.
It's about going at your own pace.
So this is what I'm comfortable with. What I am capable of.
They say "think about your son's future".
I am. That's why I am home with him, nurturing him, educating him, loving him.
This is my decision.
Maybe in the future, if Allah s.w.t. wills it, I will continue with my Masters when the kids (insyaAllah) are in school, insyaAllah.
This is my pace.
Anis
coming back to reality.....
1 week ago
4 comments:
Anis, i am proud of you and to a certain extent, i envy what you are doing. It's not a matter of the grass is greener on the other side, but rather it's what i would do when i finally manage to get married;). You remind me of my mum, who gave up her degree and career so that she could raise her family, and i think that is the noblest thing that anyone could do. She never did have the time to pursue her master's coz she could not bear to be separated from her children, and it does not make her respectable or knowledgeable or ambitious. It's just a matter of priorities, and no one has the right to dictate what one wants in life?
Thank you Maira. So honoured to have some semblance of your mother.
:)
Dear Anis,
To tell you the truth, your job is the best job in the world. I have always wanted to be stay at home mother and be happy mak to Nuha. Don't bother about other people. They are just 'others'.
Be happy okay. :)
Thank you. All the best to you and family. :)
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